


the fairy baramother, the business man, and oikawa tooru

by kakug0



Category: Haikyuu!!, SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: Crack, M/M, Multi, Other, i put my heart and soul into this, see this mom i made st of myself, this is for everyone who said i wouldnt make it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-20 23:57:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20684090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakug0/pseuds/kakug0
Summary: oikawa is stuck in an unexpected love triangle, one of stars and sparkles.





	the fairy baramother, the business man, and oikawa tooru

**Author's Note:**

> i will walk up to satan himself in hell and graciously accept my punishment for i am greater than my sins

oikawa had always had a crush on Patrick-senpai. but today, for some reason, he wasnt wearing pants! kyaaa! hes the most successful in the business and has a whole four buildings, one of them to commemorate his successes alone. oikawa watches Patrick-senpai from afar, flushed cheeks. kyaa! doki doki goes oikawas heart as Patrick-senpai glances over for a split second. his star shape is so kawaii, but it was time for oikawa to work.

[enter _morgan freeman_] the next day. [exit _morgan freeman_]

kyaaa! oikawa didn't wear his pants today bc he wanted to be like Patrick-senpai. but no matter what, his milky thighs didn't reach the successful business man. he even took the time to bend over and even wore his special kissy lip tight underwear. but no matter what, his pantslessness did not attract Patrick-senpai. whatever shall his doki doki heartbeat lead him to do? to be continued _cue jojo music_

\---

[_enter morgan freeman_] later that night. [_exit morgan freeman_]

a muscled fairy poofed into his room late at night. oikawa really wished there was another description for him, but his biceps were much larger than his translucent fairy wings. he also had a scowl on his face.

"congratulations, i'm your fairy godmother."

"excuse me?"

"i'm your fairy godmother."

_what does this mean..._ oikawa thought to himself. then he craned his neck, resting his head on his chin as he replied, with a very pointed smirk, "oh yeah? show me your magic then."

"okay." the 'fairy godmother' flexed his biceps and out came sparkles on either side of him. oikawa couldnt help but clap but it wasn't good enough to support his claim.

"what else?"

"well.." and he started to take his pants off.

oikawa stared in awe at the fairy godmother (baramother in doki doki terms). even his dick was magical. with a flex of his biceps, it rose up like a magical tower and sparkled with glittering nut.

"sugoi!" oikawa clapped. then he realized his grave error.

he'd invited someone over this fine night. someone he'd been trying to woo for a very long time.

"by the way, call me iwaizumi--"

"iwa-chan you have to go!" oikawa cried out, jumping up. but it was too late, Patrick-senpai in all his star-shaped glory entered through his bedroom door. he simply stood there...looking...star-like....eyes on iwa-chan's magical penis.

he said nothing.

_jojo music here..._

**Author's Note:**

> now you are all sinners too, i'll see you there


End file.
